A very long time ago, someone said to me that they'd wanted to meet me very much after seeing my picture somewhere on the internet. This sweet person needed someone by their side in their last days and I guess fate's lottery decided I'd be the one to do it. They're safe now, and that's what's important.

I can't get your face out of my mind. And I've tried, lots of times. My infatuation runs so deep that if I died and they buried my body in the cemetery, the bugs that ate me would dream of you.

I realized how much I hated some folks the other day, and in the same breath realized it had been so long as to be nearly meaningless. Do we forgive and forget, lighten the load while we cling to this rock flying through space? Then again, what's in it for me?

I used to think my darkest days were the ones I found at the bottom of so many bottles. But I always had someone to cry for me in those days. It's the reason I managed to climb out. No, my darkest days were the ones I faced full of hope but utterly alone, when I felt at my strongest because I gave up on depending on anyone. I actually was at my weakest.

The singer at the first live music show I ever went to on my own passed away a few years ago. I wonder if he knew how his show is the first time I felt free of social anxiety? Surely a great artist knows the power of their art? Rest in peace, Stefan.

When I was a kid, my Dad rented Metroid for the NES for me one night. I didn't get far, but whenever I hear the original Metroid theme, I always feel so safe, like he's nearby. A lullaby from a world long since passed.

3am sounds like the village of Tristram from Diablo (1997). It was probably the first game I stayed up late playing on the internet. The thought of a late night has those guitars and the howling wolf and the drone of the background bass. 3am always reminds me to Stay a While and Listen.

My biggest regrets are all the things I didn't do. Usually little things. I wish I'd shared more. I wish I'd listened more. Sometimes you'll be sitting with someone and unsure of what to say- and it'll be the most important moment in the world. Sunsets on the levy.

This past weekend, the whole world came out to tell me how much they loved me. It's funny, how loved I am. My tombstone will say beloved by everyone except themselves.

There's this overgrown witch's house in the neighborhood I used to live in. On that block my favorite radio station would be overridden by a pirate radio station that I suspect comes from the large radio antennae sticking out of the foliage. One day I saw a hearse outside, and then the radio stopped being disrupted. I wonder endlessly who they were.

Sometimes when reality is thin, I feel like if I can just gather my wits and my sword, I can venture out into the hills beyond town, up the winding mountains and through the raging storms and if I do all this, battle the elements along the way, I'll find my Dad. I'll find him and clean him up and wrap him in a blanket and carry him back home, through more fire and flame and when I bring him home to my Mom I'll tell him everything about all he's missed- well maybe not everything. The current zeitgeist would probably make him run back to the grave.

I hate it when my hands are this cold.